I’ve written the two first chapters of my new book yesterday, and invited in my old friend, self doubt.
Me: Hey, self doubt, please, come in.
SD: Thanks Michael. Don’t mind if I sit down.
Me: That’s actually my chair…
Me: Uh… Would you like to drink anything? Tea? Coffee?
SD: Can you make coffee the way I like?
Me: I don’t know, how do you like it?
SD: that’s disappointing. Water’s fine.
Me: Right. One glass of water, coming right up.
SD: Glass, huh?
Me: I don’t… would you rather drink a mug of water?
SD: Nevermind. I’m not thirsty anymore. What do we have here?
Me: The first two chapters of my new book. Isn’t it great?
SD: So this is a chase scene, huh?
Me: Well, it’s more of an introduction. I want the readers to get a feel for the characters.
SD: There’s a chase here.
SD: It’s crap.
Me: I know. I totally intend to rewrite it later.
SD: Of course you are. And the fact that you don’t know how to write a chase scene doesn’t have any impact on your writing skills.
Me: I didn’t say it did. Does it?
SD: So, second chapter. What do we have here. Mhm. Uh huh. Hmmmm.
Me: I mean, I guess I could make it a bit more… interesting?
Me: Yeah, I mean the first part definitely needs working on, and the dialog here about the elevator…
SD: Interesting character here, this Richie.
Me: Is he?
SD: What do you think?
Me: I can rewrite it. I can rewrite it all.
SD: No, no, it’s really okay. I’m not bored at all.
Me: Bored? It’s just the first two chapters…
SD: I think I’d like that water after all. It’s becoming really dry here.
Some rewrites later this week. People say you should never edit the first draft while working on it. I say, get out of my office, I’m trying to work here, and stop giving me advice.